Stupid Democrats

So let's get this straight. In 2006, we, the constituents of America, hand you Congress. Gift wrapped with a bow. We attached a nice note that said, "I've liked you since the 2nd grade." We even threw in a bag of candy hearts that said "be mine".


At which point, you put forth a few good ideas. You put forth some pretty monumental efforts. Yet, it was all only the vast majority of them to be shot down by President Bush, or result in a financial bailout for corporations that likely had a significant role to play in the countries economic downward spiral in the first place. But we, the constituents, looked past that. We understood that the reason you couldn't come to the movies to make out was that your daddy wouldn't let you out the house. The reason you couldn't be the prom queen was because the principal wouldn't sign off on the tiara. The reason you couldn't pitch was because coach would let you out the dugout.

So, in Nov. 2008, we changed the coach, so you could throw your no-hitter game. We gave you a new principal so that you could shine in your majestic glory. We gave you a new Daddy, Democrats, a new daddy!

Metaphors aside for a moment. Really, for all the roadblocks you hit while Bush was in office, we overwhelmingly voted in a new leader to the White House to alleviate your pain and suffering. We, as a nation, sighed a sigh of relief to the notion that "now, ok, now things will get done". Dems own Congress, in need of no Republican support whatsoever from Senate or the House of Representatives. Dems own the White House, no opposition from the President, as he's more visionary than most and is really, and I mean really trying to get things done. So now, with all of these pieces in place for Democrats as a group to do literally whatever you wanted with any aspect of our federal government, the first and ONLY thing you all decide to do is.........

Squabble.

I promise. If 2012 rolls around and we haven't reformed healthcare, made progress in Afghanistan, stopped the national economic tailspin, AND closed Guantanamo Bay, I'm switchin parties! Not only am I switching, but I'm campaigning, hard. For whomever the hell is not Republican or Democratic Party. I'll listen to any other party out there Independent, Green, Black Panther, you name it!

Because really, what's your excuse? WHAT IS YOUR EXCUSE!? You have none! Your opposition is insignificant! It's like your playing football and the defense only has 3 people on the other side of the scrimmage - and you jackasses are arguing about which play you want to execute to score the touchdown! How do you not realize that it doesn't matter what the hell you do, we just want to score!!

And so now, you blame Republicans for playing politics. You blame insurance companies for ambushing town hall meetings and spreading false rumors. You blame the previous administration for leaving such a huge mess left to clean up. But really, where I am sure all of those excuses are real and factual - it's October. It is October. It is October. And besides pulling the trigger on a stimulus package that was already halfway written this time last year, you have nothing to show for yourselves.

This is the epitome of shameful. Stupid Democrats.