less naps (part 2)

i'm spending money like i got it,
doing things like i don't need sleep,
not giving a damn what i eat,
relationships lasting all but a week,
and i brag,
like the nerve of this shit doesn't make me look bad,
i'm not mad, i'm just pensive,
so i talk like i'm deep and stuff,
using four syllable words and such,
like the fundamental quality of my brain's as much,
and then contract my lexicon to say "fuck",
i mean,
i front like image isn't important,
while knowing all the while that image is really the only thing that we've got,
if reality is relative, then perception is real,
even if the image that's perceived is not,
and then i'm caught in my rants again,
writing blogs when i should be looking for jobs,
or sketching my plans,
acting like my life is not in my hands,
it's at my fingertips, it's on her pretty lips, it's just a grasp away,
sigh,
inhale,
hold it,
exhale,
through the mouth,
think,
i heard a man say once that you have to make your next move your best move ya'dig,
he added the ya'dig, not me,
i just added the audience,
i try to pay attention even though it may seem i'm not listenin',
my distractions are sincere though, random, but true,
and though i'm in no way obligated to explain my way through,
it's just pleasant to know i have that chance to tell you,
i may never be the man that i wish to be,
i may always have these faults that i fight every day,
but if i ever get the chance to die for what i believe,
i'll go down, tell the world i lived not in vain,
tell the world that we tried it, every way we could see,
tell them not to be afraid to get hurt, or to bleed,
tell them...ha, there i go on my rants again,
if you need me, i'll grinding,
get at me then.

(this is dedicated to the 90min sleep i was about to take, but decided not to for the sake of productivity. r.i.p. dreams, you won't be forgotten)